Innocent Until Proven… Well, You Know How It Goes
Welcome back to another week in Farmington, CT, where the arrests come in hot and heavy—except legally speaking, they didn’t happen. Let’s all take a moment to reflect on the fact that we live in the United States, where even a third-degree assault at 3:45 p.m. on New Britain Ave still carries the comforting phrase: “innocent until proven guilty.” Yes, we’re a civilized bunch.
This edition of Farmington’s legal escapades is brought to you by Farmington Storage, where the air quality is so pristine that your court summons will stay fresher longer than your public image. Call them at 860.777.4001—because even your parking tickets deserve museum-quality air.
Thursday, Sept. 18-19: Why Be Peaceful When You Can Be Disorderly?
Farmington PD kicked off their Thursday with only Jessica Leah Sikora, 34, from Avon, who felt that 3:45 p.m. on New Britain Ave was the perfect time for a disorderly conduct and third-degree assault two-for-one special. Arrested by Officer Vitkus, Jessica posted a $5,000 non-surety bond quicker than you can say “court date.” You can catch her courtroom debut on Sept. 19, where she’ll likely tell the judge that it was all just a big misunderstanding over who got the last parking spot.
Meanwhile, just a couple of hours earlier—because clearly, New Britain Ave was the place to be—Shari Lee Augustino, 53, decided she wasn’t about to let Jessica have all the fun. Officer Vitkus also arrested her for disorderly conduct, proving once again that Farmington has its share of mid-afternoon excitement. Shari also posted a $5,000 bond because why not? Court’s set for Sept. 19; rumor has it she’s already planning her wardrobe for the big day.
Friday, Sept. 19: The Late-Night Special
Enter Timothy Tyrome McCrorey, 53, who thought, “Why not end Thursday night with a DUI?” Timothy was arrested at 11:56 p.m. near Main St. and Scott Swamp Rd. by Officer Kelsey R. Fortier, presumably after a spirited game of “Can I drive better drunk than sober?” Spoiler alert: he couldn’t. With a $5,000 surety bond posted, Timothy will be strolling into court on Oct. 2 to explain how his late-night escapade got a little too spirited.
But hey, what’s Friday night without a little more disorder? Elizabeth Anne Negretti, 62, decided to cap her evening at 10:24 p.m. with some disorderly conduct and a dash of third-degree assault—because nothing says “weekend vibes” like a police station visit. Officer Michael A. Meier handled this one, and Elizabeth also ponied up a $5,000 bond. Her court date? Sept. 20. She’s probably wondering if she’ll be home in time for bingo.
And let’s not forget Louis James Campbell, 62, from Manchester, who was arrested by Officer Pacifico T. Flores at the ever-popular 6:51 p.m. slot for second-degree harassment. We’re not saying Louis took harassing to the next level, but with a surety bond of $10,000, we’re betting he didn’t just send someone an angry emoji. Court date’s set for Sept. 20, and we can only hope Louis cools his jets in the meantime.
Wednesday, Sept. 17-18: When in Doubt, Don’t Show Up to Court—Again
It wouldn’t be a complete week in Farmington without the MVP of failure to appear charges: Shilohnine J Nicholas, 41. Arrested by Officer Jonathan Sotelo not once, not twice, but three times in one night (seriously, that’s dedication), Shilohnine was hit with bonds totaling $50,000. Somehow, she posted it all, because missing court once is human, but missing it repeatedly? That’s talent. Let’s see if she actually makes it to her new court date on Sept. 30. The suspense is killing us.
And just for kicks, Christopher Rivera, 42, of Wolcott, rounded out the week with some third-degree burglary and first-degree larceny. Arrested by Officer Zachary J. Martin at 9:37 a.m.—because apparently, there’s no bad time for a burglary—Chris posted a $100,000 bond. Yes, that’s right, folks, six figures. He’ll be back in court on Sept. 24, possibly to explain what made that burglary worth such a hefty price tag.
Farmington Storage: For When Your Arrest Record Needs Museum-Quality Preservation
Need a place to stash your legal woes? Farmington Storage has you covered with air so fresh it’ll make your questionable life choices feel like they never even happened. Give them a call at 860.777.4001 and ask about their “emergency bail bonds box” special (not a real product, but we’re just saying—it could be).
-JB-
Jack Beckett
Jack Beckett is powered by coffee and an undying love for slow-news journalism. When not covering Farmington’s legal elite, Jack can be found debating which brew method is superior (it’s cold brew, don’t @ me).
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