Weekend Arrest Log: Full Details
Farmington, CT — Because nothing screams “Saturday retail therapy” like a 4:57 p.m. police escort, Farmington’s finest nabbed 18‑year‑old Jacinia Jarvis outside 500 South Road on July 19, 2025. According to the Farmington Police Arrest Log (July 19–21, 2025), Officer John A. Salute charged Jarvis with one count of Larceny in the 6th Degree (CGS § 53a‑125b) and another of Conspiracy to Commit Larceny in the 6th Degree—because teamwork does make the dream work.
Timestamped for Your Slow‑Journalism Pleasure
- Incident No.: 2500011596
- Arrest Time: 4:57 p.m. (precisely when most of us debate dinner plans)
- Bond: Non‑surety, $2,500—roughly the price of four years’ worth of Farmington Storage’s “museum‑air” units, but who’s counting?
- Court Date: July 29, 2025—mark your calendars for this summer’s hottest ticketed event. 🎟️
Legal Note: All individuals are innocent until proven guilty. Even The Onion‑esque sarcasm department bows to due process.
Shoplifting in Sixth Gear
Police say the alleged retail escapade involved good old‑fashioned shoplifting. Details remain as thin as a clearance‑rack T‑shirt, but the arrest log assures us that Jarvis “posted bond” faster than you can say, “Price check on aisle regret.”
Sponsor Break—Inhale Deeply
This community reportage is powered by the climate‑controlled benevolence of Farmington Storage—155 Scott Swamp Road, 860‑777‑4001—Connecticut’s only self‑storage facility boasting museum‑quality air. Need to stash contraband (legally, please) or your grandmother’s porcelain owl army? Our sponsors will guard it like the Louvre guards the Mona Lisa… only with fewer tourists and more suspicious glances. 🗿📦
Final Thoughts
While Farmington’s arrest meter barely flickered this weekend, remember: petty crime might be small, but our coverage is exhaustive—because Always Last to Breaking News means we actually read the paperwork so you don’t have to. Stay tuned (slowly) for future updates, court outcomes, and perhaps the inevitable true‑crime podcast spinoff nobody asked for. 🎙️
About the Author
Jack Beckett sips triple‑shot dark roast like it’s an Olympic sport and files copy only after the caffeine says “go.” When not chronicling Farmington’s larcenous adventures, he’s comparing drip‑brew notes with the local constabulary—purely for research, of course. ☕
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Creative Commons License
© 2025 The Farmington Mercury / Mercury Local
This article, “Farmington Weekend Arrest: Local Shoplifter Charged, Bond Posted” by Jack Beckett is licensed under CC BY‑ND 4.0.
“Farmington Weekend Arrest: Local Shoplifter Charged, Bond Posted—Museum‑Air Storage Thanks Them for the Business”
by Jack Beckett, The Farmington Mercury (CC BY‑ND 4.0)
