Modeling Floods, Wrangling Debris, and the Great Boulder Strip Compromise
“I Gave Up Fishing in Boy Scouts Because I Always Ended Up in the River”
FARMINGTON, CT — APR 25, 2025 | By Jack Beckett
The Farmington Inland Wetlands Commission opened its April 16th meeting with the kind of roll call confusion only possible when two commissioners share a name and George forgets he’s on mute. The business, however, quickly turned serious: the Farmington Land Trust is attempting to repair a riverbank and build a new boardwalk/observation platform downstream on River Road. Whether that work would stabilize the riverbank—or destabilize the Commission—was the question of the night.
Let’s rewind. The Land Trust is proposing two linked projects:
- Removal of a failed fishing platform, replaced by a natural boulder revetment to stabilize the eroded riverbank.
- Installation of a 16×16-foot cantilevered boardwalk and observation deck, complete with piers anchored into visible bedrock.
Both projects were previewed on a Monday evening site walk attended by commissioners and representatives from SLR Consulting, including wetland scientist Matt Sanford and structural engineer Kishore Patel.
💬 Key Concerns Raised:
- Access near boulders: Trampling of new plantings by birdwatchers and kids was addressed with a compromise—a 3 to 4-foot gravel strip behind the revetment.
- Erosion near the Unionville culvert: Not on Land Trust property, so not in their scope. Public Works may deal with it.
- Pier scour & flood durability: Patel confirmed the piers will be pinned to bedrock and backfilled with existing boulders, avoiding scour. Still, questions remained.
👷♂️Debris Modeling Drama:
Commissioner Robert Eisner asked whether the design accounted for “worst-case debris jams”—think tree trunks, tires, the occasional refrigerator. SLR said traditional hydraulic models wouldn’t simulate debris. Eisner disagreed, advocating for “lateral load modeling” to show the structure could withstand a 100- or 500-year flood.
Patel offered to apply lateral load calculations to the columns, while Sanford emphasized that the structure was not spanning the river—just nudging its edge.
🌳 Tree Overhang, Railing Safety, and Slippery Rocks:
Commissioner Neil Kelsey pointed out a leaning tree that might crash onto the new deck someday and recommended an arborist review. He also raised a familiar concern: “I gave up fishing in Boy Scouts because I always ended up slipping on a rock.” The proposed revetment might just be a reenactment zone for that memory. He advocated for a railing; Chair Ned Statchen replied that people would just fish from wherever the railing ends.
🎯 The Vote That Broke the Dam (Metaphorically):
After an extensive and genuinely thoughtful exchange, Eisner moved that the project be deemed a “significant activity,” triggering a mandatory public hearing. The motion passed 4-2. A hearing is now scheduled for May 21, 2025.
While the majority agreed the Land Trust’s plan is fundamentally sound—and even beneficial—they argued the scale and type of work merited transparency and public input. It’s a precedent thing.
🏛️ Quotable Quotes:
- “I think we’re changing [the river] back to a better situation.” — Ned Statchen
- “I’m not worried about the piers getting knocked over, I’m worried about everything else getting knocked loose.” — Rich Berlandi
- “The goal is not to prevent the next flood, it’s to make sure our platform isn’t the cause of someone else’s flood.” — Robert Eisner
Meanwhile, Back at the Porch:
In less aquatic news, the Commission also reviewed a request from a homeowner at 371 Meadow Road to rebuild a screened-in porch into a full two-story addition. The wetlands were nearby but not adjacent, and while the project was described as “low-impact,” Commissioners ultimately requested a formal application to avoid future ambiguity. As one put it, “Where do we draw the line?” 🏡
The Farmington Mercury is brought to you by Farmington Storage—the only place in town with more square footage than the Inland Wetlands regs.
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Tagline? “Don’t let your stuff end up in the river. Unless it’s debris modeling. Then call Kishore.” 😎
Jack Beckett
Senior Writer, The Farmington Mercury
☕ Runs on cold brew, spite, and 11:59 p.m. editorial deadlines. Still haunted by a single missed semicolon in 2012.
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